Mom & Dad is fresh!
Kid friendly parents are cool parents, right? They are friends with their kids. And their kids’ friends love them. But is this the best thing for our kids. And does it create a healthy parent-child relationship?“[Kids] don’t remember what you try to teach them. They remember what you are.” ― Jim Henson
You are not your child equal!
Sure, you want your kids to feel safe and to trust you. But the fact is there needs to be rules. Between parents and their children, especially teens. These boundaries make for the healthy development of the child. Not only that, parenting without these limitations puts undue pressure on the parent. That makes it difficult to disciple.
Kid friendly mother’s love their children.
Think about it. If your friend tries to punish you, or give you an order, how likely are you feeling compelled to fall in line? Wouldn’t your instinctual reaction be wondering who your friend is to think they have the right to tell you what to do? As a parent, your job is to provide guidance, structure, and order even if you have to do (or make them do) something they don’t want.
What’s up with these kid friendly parents?
In other words, kids may not want it, but they need it. Children do need to feel safe with their parents, don’t get me wrong. But the fact is, there are things that children will never tell their friends, because they don’t want to feel judged, or they think their friends won’t understand. Teens, especially, try to impress their friends, and so they’re often inclined to show them a side of them that may not be the whole truth.
Friendly is mom and pop.
When it comes to parenting, it’s crucial that our children never feel that we do not understand their feelings, or they will keep them to themselves. And that isn’t good for them. What’s worse, it makes it difficult for parents to pick up on signs that something is wrong like depression. So, how can parents make sure that they’re being their children’s role model, and not their friend. Well, one way is to avoid revealing personal adult life with your child.
Being your teen friend isn’t always the right choice.
There are some things, like your adult problems, or complicated issues, that you should probably keep to yourself. Telling your children the intricate details about these issues can be an unnecessary burden to them, and give them the feeling that they have to be stronger for you, rather than the other way around.
Friendship with your teenage child can become complicated.
I’m not saying you should not let them know anything that’s happening in your life, but be careful not to share too much about your relationship or financial burdens. Sharing may leave the child feeling that they’re the one who needs to do the parenting. Being your child’s parent, and not their friend doesn’t mean you should stop spending time with them, though. Hanging out, just having fun with them, is a healthy part of parent-child relationships.
Kid friendly parents beware!
What it does mean is that your kids know that you’re an authority figure, not their peer. You can be a fun respected person, one that your children enjoy spending time with, but, ultimately, your role is as their strength, support, and role model, setting healthy limits to ensure they grow into healthy adults themselves.