Self-Pity Might Be The Very Thing That’s Keeping You Under
“Self-pity becomes your oxygen. But you learned to breathe it without a gasp. So, nobody even notices you’re hurting.” – Paul Monette We’ve all had those moments or days where we wallow in our own self-pity. Life is not always fair and we do feel sorry for ourselves. Maybe you studied harder than anyone for that test and you still failed. To top it off, your friend who never studies passed with flying colors and doesn’t even care about the results.
Self-Pity Might Be The Very Thing That’s Keeping You Under
How much good does self-pity do, though?
The answer is quite simple. Its like sugar, it’s got absolutely zero nutritional value and doesn’t benefit your soul, or mental health. In the least bit. The thing about self-pity is that it’s deeply rooted in our self-esteem. Actually, the two are more connected by pride than anything else. I know, I know…I’m not making you feel any better by judging your ego here. BUT understanding why self-pity is actually an important step in ditching this habit. Simple and without any serious pointing of fingers that will leave you feeling even more scarred.
Self-Pity Might Be The Very Thing That’s Keeping You Under
While it’s ok to feel overwhelmed done in. Treated unfair when bad situations arise. It’s the lingering on the negative that’s really damaging. The pity party lasts longer. Than the tough situation does. We carry self indulgence like an oversized bag and we start packing everything we can fit into it in.
Self-Pity Might Be The Very Thing That’s Keeping You Under personal belongings so stuffed. The natural thing would be. To put the bag down or empty it. We don’t.  Our baggages stays close to us. Getting harder to deal with each day. Have you ever had to lug a heavy backpack around with you all day? Maybe while you were traveling. Or on a day where you had to take extra books to class? Remember that feeling. Of  wanting to put the heavy bag down? You started feeling tired and irritated. At the fact that it was so heavy. Even hurt your arms and back to carry. To lug around. That’s what the self-pity bag does.
Self-Pity Might Be The Very Thing That’s Keeping You Under
So the question is how exactly do we put it down?
Its more of a habit that’s not easy to pinpoint. But it can be changed.  Tom Robbins had this to say about Self-pity and self-esteem alike: “Heh! Self-esteem is for sissies. Accept that you’re a pimple and try to keep a lively sense of humor about it. That way lies grace and maybe even glory.”
Self-Pity Might Be The Very Thing That’s Keeping You Under
A little bit of soul searching and acceptance. What you find hidden can help you heal. In the long term. Accept the truth and make the right changes. Instead of  stuffing more into your tote bag. Try carry less it’s a lighter load.
Let’s all of us pimples as Tom Robbins says. Get to know ourselves. A little better and ditch the drama. Its for our own good and the good of others. I’ll leave you with the words of Catherynne M. Valente and the comical way she views self-pity. “You ain’t no wood stove. You can’t just squat in the middle of my house and stew.”  Do you get it. What do you think? Talk to me. No pity party here not today. Genuine friendships allowed with Friends. Who will be pick you up. When self-pity takes its toll.  leave your comment below
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I can see how self pity would bring someone down. I Hate feeling like that.
My husband is always the first to tell me to stop pitying myself and that there are worse situations out there.
Accepting yourself for who you are can help eliminate that self-pitying feeling, especially when being down on yourself really never serves you.
I think self-pity is definitely damaging. Learning how to see your situation from a different angle is probably helpful.
As a perfectionist my whole life, I’ve had some definite pity party moments. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned to let things go because it’s not important.
I think everyone feels a little self-pity every once in a while, what’s important is to be able to turn it around.
Self pity is never easy on anyone. It drags you down, it’s very toxic and it would never you do any good. It’s okay to feel bad for what happening to you but you should always move on from it, once you dwell in an experience or a bad feeling, that’s when the self pity kicks in.
Hi Patrice,
We have to be on the lookout for self-pity because it creeps in on us.
I agree it is wise to take a deeper look at ourselves and find the reason for low self-esteem.
In doing so, we will see also that we are loved and valued.
This give us a choice in the way we see ourselves.
Great topic,
Vernon
Vernon, You are so right self-pity can creeps on us when we lease expect. But it is a hard feeling to shake at times. If we stop comparing our self to others this may help.
Very nice blogpost and inspiring. I love talking to get out there and see things on my own perspective. i take negative into positive.
Thanks for this post. I think I am having lots of this issue – self pity. I need to learn how to overcome it for a brighter future.
I know how easy it is to wallow in moment so self-pity. Our challenge is to give it a few minutes and then #letitgo!
This is so important and serious topic. Good you shared it. Thank you for sharing.
Self-pity is a huge weight on people these days. Don’t wallow in pity for yourself, it gets you nowhere. Chin up and move on!
Thanks for this post. I think we all feel a little self pity once in a while.
I hate that feeling self-pity, thanks for this post and a great topic
Most of us experience self-pity throughout our lifetimes. It will lead us to depression, anxiety and low self-esteem. Great topic.
Thanks for this post. I wish many will read this. Good you shared about it.
I think that self pity really does keep a lot of people down. I agree that keeping a good sense of humor about things does keep thing in perspective