5 Social Skills Conversation Starters — Avoid Being an Outcast
Developing social skills in group settings is vital. It teaches young people how to interact respectfully and confidently in diverse environments. When these skills aren’t developed early, some kids may end up feeling like outcasts.
Some of you may find conversation easy—even when you’re having a rough day. If so, count yourself lucky. But for many others, making small talk or approaching someone new can be nerve-wracking.
“Everyone has their own ways of expression. I believe we all have a lot to say, but finding ways to say it is more than half the battle.” — Criss Jami
Start Simple, Stay Calm
Even if socializing feels awkward at first, that’s okay. Most people experience discomfort when talking to strangers. If your first attempt doesn’t go well, smile it off. You’re just learning what not to say, and that’s valuable too.
1. Ask for Advice
People love being asked for their opinion—it makes them feel valued. Try:
“What do you think of this event—is it worth attending?”
“I’ve been wondering if this place is always this crowded—what’s your experience?”
This works especially well at school functions, parties, or community events.
2. Ask a Personal (But Light) Question
Invite others to talk about themselves with easy, non-invasive questions:
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“I haven’t seen you around before—just move here?”
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“What’s been your favorite part of this event so far?”
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“Isn’t that food table amazing? Have a favorite?”
Avoid checking your phone—be present. Your body language says, “I’m approachable.”
3. Offer a Genuine Compliment
People open up when they feel appreciated. Use compliments as conversation starters:
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“Wow, that color really suits you!”
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“You have a calming presence—are you always this chill?”
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“Your laugh is contagious!”
Sincere praise disarms social anxiety—both yours and theirs.
4. Use Relatable, Neutral Conversation
Stay away from negative comments. You don’t have to fake excitement—just choose thoughtful phrasing:
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✅ “That assignment was a challenge. What did you think?”
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✅ “Today feels packed. You ready for it?”
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❌ “Our teacher is the worst—don’t you agree?”
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❌ “I’m dreading this. Wish I could leave.”
You want to connect, not vent. Keep the vibe welcoming.
5. Admit Your Awkwardness
If you’re nervous, own it—it humanizes you and puts others at ease. Try:
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“I’m not the best at starting conversations, but I wanted to say hi. I’m [Name].”
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“I always blank out when meeting new people—ever feel that too?”
People are far more forgiving (and understanding) than you think.
Bonus Tip: Keep Practicing
Communication is like a muscle—it grows with use. Smile, make eye contact, and show genuine curiosity. You’ll soon find yourself getting better and feeling more confident.
Programs like “Second Step” in West Haven, Connecticut, show how schools are helping students gain skills like emotional regulation and healthy interaction. And you can start practicing those skills too—anytime, anywhere.
Final Thoughts
Being socially confident doesn’t mean being perfect. It means being real, kind, and open. Don’t let the fear of rejection silence your voice. Keep trying—and you’ll discover you’re not an outcast, you’re just learning how to connect.
Great advice! I always love to compliment people when I first meet them, its that open door for an invitation of a new person to open up to you better! It works!
Very good advice. Sometimes conversations flow naturally and other times it is an awkward silence. Compliments are always a great way to at the very least get a smile out of someone.
Great tips! I’m working on teaching my daughter social skills.
Where was this when I was in school? I was always the awkward shy girl. I have improved so much when it comes to social settings now that I am an adult.
This is a great post. I’ve always struggled with my social abilities, but having an outgoing child has forced me to become more of a people-person.
I think teaching social skills is essential for kids. And parents should be doing it too.
These are great conversation starters. I used to be so shy when I was younger, but I became more of an extrovert as I grew older.
This is great advice for kids who may be shy. It’s always good to have a few convo starters in your arsenal if you are feeling like reaching out but don’t know how.
These tips are perfect for someone that needs a little reassurance before venturing out to a big event. In person Social skills is something people don’t put to use as often as we used to.
Felissa (Two Little Cavaliers), Reassurance is needed not only for big event as you say but to also help adolescent who are shy.
I completely agree with you that having (and teaching) solid social skills is important. It just makes so many things easier…making friends, working as a team, and even builds confidence. I’m grateful that I’m pretty comfortable with most social situations and can thank my mom for being a great example.
Great tips! Social media had definitely changed the way we communicate. Developing good social skills is invaluable and can take you far in life.
I agree that compliments are a good thing, but over the top flattery is just annoying and comes across fakey.
Great tips.. still teaching my son social skills. He is getting better
What a great tips, I teaching my son about social skills and he learned. I’d like to spread this.
I’m not that good when it comes to communicating with people for the first time or maybe opening a conversation. I feel awkward most of the time. So I just wait for people to talk to me. These are nice tips though. I could really use them.
Elizabeth O. I understand it take time!
Oh my gosh, seriously all you have to do is ask someone about themselves sometimes and that’s it. The flood gates open, lol
These are great tips for people who are introverts, shy, or just new to networking. It can be hard to get the conversation going.
These are some great ideas! When I first moved and would be in awkward social situations I always would ask a the person about themselves. Swear 9 out of 10 times it works like a charm. People love to talk about themselves lol
I’m a total introvert, and doing these things has helped me get out of my shell. My husband is so good at it. I like to watch him to see how he gets people talking.
Stephanie, Being around the support of kind and gentle person can often help you to take the first step.
I think I am luck in that I can start a conversation. I like these tips. Sometimes there are people that need a little push to start up.
Social skills didn’t come natural to me until I got older. I still get a few butterflies in my stomach in new situations.